It is 930, and the girls have only just gone down. They were crazed tonight - neither of them could sleep at all so I let them stay up in my bed and we read stories, though I was JUNKSING for some down time.
Today was an odd day...so hazy, cold grey sky. Jennifer had to finish a paper so I came home at lunch. How much should I reveal in this blog? I felt this afternoon like my neural network was suffering - I wanted a hit of sugar, directly to the brain, a shot of pure, unadultered caffeine to jolt me out of my stupor. When I look at my life, I think most of my adulthood has been spent in a painful, fuzzy state. How do I break out?
Reading Alice Water's biography and what impresses me most is her confidence, her drive, her action. She was completely untrained, unprepared, and yet she ploughed through. Where does one find that energy? That drive? I've been chasing it, salivating over it since I was a kid. I am finding the writing a bit rough, though. DId anyone else find they were distracted by poor writing/editing?
I think I would do well to be more of a perfectionist. Alice would toss anything that wasn't perfect. The slap-dash mishaps and leftovers I pawn off on people.....
Who is Alice Waters? Should I know this?
ReplyDeletenevermind, I just googled.
ReplyDeleteNice new look. Quite inspiring actually. Not that I'd be inspired to update mine or anything...
ReplyDeleteMiranda,
ReplyDeleteI feel a little sheepish reading your blog and not commenting, so here goes.
Cut yourself some slack, girl! It sounds as if you are discounting all that you have already achieved in your life, which is considerable. I often wonder where you get YOUR energy...
What I'm beginning to accept, with two small children at home, is that it's impossible to measure accomplishment by the day. At this stage -- and it won't last forever -- you put together little bits of effort and energy here and there, around the quotidien duties, toward a larger goal.
The food photos look amazing and the writing will happen -- is happening... Keep at it.
Christie